end of the beginning

the end of the beginning has come.
and now begins the rest of the story,
at least as far as teaching goes.

yesterday was my final day with the kids--
those little 4th and 5th graders who captured my heart.
i fought to hide the wet eyes
as they presented me with a book of letters,
each hand-written,
and laminated "for extra special."
brandon wouldn't let go of a side hug and begged me to stay,
while shuhaila and leslie shyly handed me a bouquet of pink roses.
you'll come back, won't you? they pleaded--
of course i'll come back, i said, and the smiles returned.

teaching is a unique experience.
you feed kids info and skills and strategies for solving problems,
while also taking care of their precious little hearts.
my kids--and too many more out in this dark world--
have experienced so much, even by age ten.
some of them have gone through harder trials than i have,
and they need a teacher who will love them
no matter what happens at home...
someone who will teach them responsibility and courage and honesty,
as well as kindness, love, and patience.
someone to do all of this and so much more--
and to realize that you may be forgotten in the future
as they grow up and walk their own ways of life.

that's a huge pair of shoes to fill.

and small as i am, as much as i have to learn,
i know that this is the path God has set before me.
my heart aches for these little ones
(and yes, 4th and 5th graders are still little)
and for children all over the world
who need someone to love them and care for them
and tell them of He whose love is much greater still.

oh Lord, let me be your servant
as i seek to walk the road of teacher.


H

sweet peas

closing my eyes takes me back in time
to grandma's garden
where they grew peacefully against the trellis
sending out a sweet perfume that anyone would succumb to

and now the intoxicating aroma
that fills my head when smelled up close
becomes a dream long-forgotten
unable to repeat or return to
and yet so near.